April 28

Interesting Anagrams

Someone out there either has way too much time, or is deadly at Scrabble!

 

Dormitory Dirty Room
Evangelist Evil’s Agent
Desperation A Rope Ends It
The Morse Code Here Come Dots
Slot Machines Cash Lost in ’em
Animosity Is No Amity
Mother-in-law Woman Hitler
Snooze Alarms Alas! No More Z’s
Alec Guinness Genuine Class
Semolina Is No Meal
The Public Art Galleries Large Picture Halls, I Bet
A Decimal Point I’m a Dot in Place
The Earthquakes That Queer Shake
Eleven plus two Twelve plus one
Contradiction Accord not in it
Year Two Thousand A Year To Shut Down

 

April 21

A Story about Mike…

There once was a COBOL programmer named Mike. After years of being taken for granted and treated as a technological dinosaur by all the relational database modelers, client/server programmers and website developers, Mike was finally getting some respect.

After separating from the Air Force, he’d become a private consultant specializing in Year 2000 conversions. He was working short-term assignments for prestige companies, traveling all over the world on different assignments, and making more money than he’d ever dreamed of. He was working 70 and 80 and even 90 hour weeks, but it was worth it. Soon he could retire. Continue reading

April 6

30 Ways to handle stress…

  1. Jam 39 tiny marshmallows up your nose and try to sneeze them out.

  2. Use your mastercard to pay your visa.

  3. Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on.

  4. When someone says “Have a nice day” tell them you have other plans.

  5. Find out what a frog in a blender really looks like.

  6. Forget the diet and send yourself a candygram.

  7. Make a list of things that you’ve already done.

  8. Dance naked in front of your pets.

  9. Put your toddlers clothes on backwards and send them off to preschool as if nothing was wrong.

  10. Retaliate for tax woes by filling out your tax return with roman numerals.

  11. Tattoo “out to lunch” on your forehead.

  12. Tape pictures fo your boss on watermelons and lobb them from high places.

  13. Leaf through National Geographic and draw underwear on the natives.

  14. Go shopping, buy everything, sweat in it, return it the next day.

  15. Buy a subscription to sleezoid weekly and set it to your bosses wife/hubby.

  16. Pay your electricity bill in pennies.

  17. Drive to work in reverse.

  18. Relay by mentally reflecting on your favourite episode of The Flintstones during that important finance meeting.

  19. Sit naked on a shelled hard-boiled egg.

  20. Refresh yourself. Put your tongue on a cold steel guardrail.

  21. Tell you boss to blow it out of his mule and let him figure it out.

  22. Polish your car with earwax.

  23. Read the dictionary upside down and look for secret messages.

  24. Start a nasty rumour and see if you recognise it when it comes back to you.

  25. Bill your doctor/dentist/whoever for time spent in his waiting room.

  26. Braid the hairs in each nostril.

  27. Write a short story; using alphabet soup.

  28. Lie on your back eating celery…. using your naval as a salt dipper.

  29. Stare at people through the lines of a fork and pretend they’re in jail.

  30. Make up a language and ask people for directions.